The Truth About the #Tradwife Trend: My Honest Thoughts

The other night, something funny happened. I was cleaning up the kitchen, feeding my sourdough starter for the night (as usual), when Peter casually glanced over and said, “You know, you’re basically a tradwife.”
I stopped mid-wipe and gave him a confused look—a what now?

I don’t usually follow trends or keep up with influencer buzzwords. Peter loves to stay up to date on everything, while I like to keep my head down and focus on my little world. Honestly, that’s what keeps me sane. The world outside feels like a hot mess, and my mental health always comes first.
But that term—tradwife—stuck with me.

So, later that night, I did what any curious mom would do: I Googled it. And the deeper I read, the more I had feelings—some good, some not-so-good. And today, I want to share my honest thoughts.

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What Even Is a Tradwife?

For those who don’t know, the #Tradwife trend refers to women embracing the idea of the “traditional” housewife: staying at home, honoring their husbands, raising children, cooking, cleaning, and generally living like a picture-perfect throwback to the 1950s.
They often dress the part, too—think vintage dresses, aprons, pearl earrings—and their social media feeds? Immaculate homes, beautiful meals, well-mannered kids, glowing family life.

At first glance, it seems sweet, right? Celebrating homemaking, family values, slowing down in this fast-paced world.
But as I kept reading and scrolling, something about it started to bug me.

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The Glorified Side of Homemaking (And What’s Missing)

Here’s what threw me for a loop:

These women are glorifying things that women—mothers, wives, grandmothers—have been doing for generations. But they’re only showing one side of the story.

Nowhere do I see the hard parts of this life.
Where’s the mess? The mental exhaustion? The moments you want to scream into a pillow because you’ve been wiping butts, scrubbing floors, and juggling a dozen things with zero recognition?
It’s like an Instagram filter over something that’s inherently gritty, exhausting, and real.

As a mom of four who’s been a stay-at-home mom for 90% of my kids' lives, let me tell you: This job is one of the most underappreciated, invisible, thoughtless, and downright hard jobs out there.

And the way #Tradwife influencers present it?
It can set up some seriously unrealistic expectations, especially for women already trying their best.

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The Unrealistic Expectations and Hidden Privilege

Here’s another thing:

Not everyone has the privilege to live this way.

I grew up in a low-income household with conservative roots. We were taught to be self-sufficient because frankly, we didn’t have much.
Today, most families need two incomes to keep the lights on, the kids fed, and a roof overhead.
So when I see these women painting this dreamy picture of staying home full-time, I have to wonder:
How many of them are leaving out the part where money isn’t a daily stressor?
How many of them have help to keep those homes spotless and camera-ready?

I work hard—not just at home raising my kids, but also running my own business and working with my brother’s company. I don’t have outside help. I don’t have endless resources.
I have hard work, sacrifice, and hustle.

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The Good Parts (Because There ARE Some!)

Now, don’t get me wrong. There are parts of the tradwife trend I genuinely appreciate.

I love that they highlight baking, gardening, sewing, and other skills that seem to be fading away. I’m a big fan of those things—I’ve even turned my hobbies into a business to help support my family.

These traditional skills are valuable, grounding, and fulfilling. They connect us to simpler times, and I think that’s beautiful.

BUT.
They’re not the measuring stick for being a good wife, mother, or homemaker.
You don’t have to bake sourdough, grow your own vegetables, or have a perfectly curated home to be providing a happy, healthy life for your family.

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My Real Life as a Stay-at-Home Mom (No Filters)

So let me be real with you:

• My house isn’t spotless.
• My kids can be loud, messy, chaotic, and a handful (and I love them anyway).
• Some days, frozen pizza is dinner, and that’s okay.
• I juggle parenting, working, budgeting, and trying to squeeze in a little self-care where I can.

Does that make me less of a “tradwife”? Maybe. But it sure makes me human.

And I think more women need to see that side of things.

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Final Thoughts: Let’s Show the Whole Picture

At the end of the day, I’m glad there’s a growing appreciation for homemaking and family-centered living. I’ve built my life around those things. But what I’d love to see from the #Tradwife trend is more honesty.
More behind-the-scenes chaos.
More messy buns and laundry piles.
More real talk about the mental load, the financial stress, the sacrifices.

Because for every curated photo, there’s a mom somewhere comparing herself, feeling like she’s falling short.
And she deserves to know—she’s already doing enough.

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You don’t have to fit a trend. You don’t have to be perfect. You just have to show up, love your family, and do your best.

That’s more than enough.

 

The Crazy Messes!

The exhaustion! The days you want to hide in the bathroom!